The Table

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I just bought a new table. It has been many years living with a table that didn’t work for us. It was small and had originally been purchased for an eat in kitchen table when my house was larger as there were more people sharing it. The table had grooves built into the top as a design feature, but you couldn’t write a letter on top of it because your pen would get stuck in the groove which ripped the paper.

So as I looked at what I had created with very old furniture because I couldn’t afford anything new, I realized I had created a very dismal, dark, heavy furniture and heavy emotions in a townhome that was supposed to be a new beginning for my daughter and I.

So I saved my money and one of our new furniture purchases was a nice, big round table in a farmhouse motif. I was so happy and then my girlfriend asked why I had purchased a round table. She told me she only ever bought square or rectangular tables because they fit our townhomes so much better.

I thought for a moment and then said, No I hate anything other than round tables. It took me a bit to think about why I had been so adamant about my statement. The house I was raised in had very long rectangular tables that were cold and uninviting. It was very cold and not a happy place at all. Even at holidays when many people would join us for Holiday meals, it was never fun but always drama and sadness.

Then when my ex told us he was leaving, we were seated in our formal dining room at a long rectangular table. I can still hear my daughter crying, no daddy don’t leave, please don’t leave. I think at that point in the back of my mind, I knew I would never have a formal table again.

I have always believed in the happiness of family dinner around a round table so that no one is at the head of the table. Everyone is equal and stories about the day are told at dinner ever evening. I have tried to keep that a must with my daughter and I as time has evolved and she is now a teenager. I only have a few more years before she is gone off to college and I hope that she enjoys sitting around the table telling stories as much as I do.

Are certain things holding you back from growing? I had kept old, heavy dark furniture because of an emotional attachment, but when I realized it wasn’t me anymore and my house needed to change just as I needed to change.