Tuesday, November 29, 2022
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Letting Go of Your Adult Children


stephen_megteachingWow today is my oldest child’s 30th birthday, I have to tell you I am feeling a bit old with a nine year old taking up my routine daily responsibilities. It seems like it was only yesterday when my son Stephen was born.

The question is how do you let go of your children when they are no longer children anymore, but young adults? It has been hard on me because being a single mom, I always worried about my kids. With my oldest Stephen-he was always sweet and quiet and I was afraid someone would kidnap him on the way home from school. With my middle child-Ryan: he was always the outgoing fun child who would talk to anyone and I would always find myself saying “son, please don’t talk to strangers” to which he would reply “he’s not strange” or “I asked him his name it is David so I know him” or the best one, “ Mom this is David-he’s single too”. Argh, I was always afraid he would be taken just because he was so happy go lucky that he would just think it was an adventure. And now there is my nine year old little girl. I can’t even begin to tell you what I am afraid of in this high tech world -things that were never a concern when my boys were little in the 80’s.

But now my son is 30. What advice would I give myself to myself when I was thirty? Well the first thing I would say is educate yourself as much as possible while you are young and the world is changing so quickly.

The second is start planning for your retirement now, even if it’s only $50.00 a paycheck. It will add up quickly and you won’t be worried about how you are going to take care of yourself or loved ones in the future. I see that young people think they will never get old, just as I did one day and now I am struggling to build a retirement account.

The last thing I would say is enjoy yourself! Take this time to do the things you want to do. Save up and take that vacation that you always dreamed of. There is no better time than now. There will come a time when you have responsibilities and other priorities that will take place of the things you once dreamed of so do them now when you are still young and you have the opportunity to do them.

It’s hard to believe that the children you have loved and guided through the years are now independent people that are fully capable of making up their own minds. It’s hard not to see them as the five year old little boys that ran through the house with mud on their feet from playing outside. Time flies fast -so my advice for people with small children is to cherish every moment you have because before you know it, they will be grown.


I found a great application through church recently. It is called “Legacy Marbles”. You input information about your child’ birthday and it gently reminds you how much time you have between now you’re your child’s graduation. I have 403 weeks before my youngest graduates high school. That might sound like a lot to a new parent, but for us seasoned parents, we know that it goes quickly and will be gone before the blink of an eye.

Legacy Marble App
Legacy Marble App

It has been difficult letting go, but I always let my children know that no matter what I am always here-just a phone call away. There is nothing that they can’t tell me, I have no judgement only love and if they ask, I will give advice from my life story and hope they don’t make the same mistakes. We can only pray and wish the best for our children.

Proverbs 22:6 Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old he will not depart from it.


Summer Brain Re-train

retrain during summer

I remember looking forward to summer as a child. No homework, sleeping in, and the sun- I loved being out in the sun.  Summer is in full swing for us and we are having a blast. I was able to change my hours at work which gives us two summer bonuses.  It allows us to sleep in a bit, not rushing like we do during the regular school year and saves me money, because I don’t have to pay the extra fee to drop children off before 8am when camp officially begins. Camp figured out that the parents have to be at work by 8am and instituted an early and late drop off fee which incurs a 25.00 extra fee weekly.

Anyway, this summer we decided that because funds were low and there would be no official summer vacation trip for us, we were going to pretend that we were on vacation every day and we make a slow morning of it. What’s better than sleeping in on vacation?

But now it is only a month away before school begins and as every parent worries, I too wonder what has my child forgotten? The week school ended, my daughter was sent home with a packet of math, a list of websites, and reading homework to help them re-train the brain during the summer.

So this past weekend, I broke out the folder and announced we only have a month left before school began and now we need to re-train our brain. My daughter was excited and grabbed the folder out of my hand, jumping on the computer. It was great to see her enthusiasm. She actually did quite well but it is something we will review every couple of days until school begins.

I’m sure your child was sent home work as well and maybe you thought as I did: give them some summer time, but now it is time to slowly begin introducing the concepts again so they don’t show up at school next month with summer brain.

www.scholastic.com/summer, coolmath.com, razkids.com and xtramath.org are a few sites that my daughter uses, but an easy internet search will provide several sites that will be just the right age for your child.

It’s time to re-train the brain.

Time Saving Dinners

prep dinners

Spiral-veggiesprepI realized a long time ago that it takes just as much time to make two dinners as it does one so after I have created my weekly plan and know what activities we have for the week, I always account for a meal that can double as two.

What craziness is this you ask? Let me tell you a time saving secret…a tip just for you-Cook a little bit more on your cooking night. For example, lets say you are having Turkey Tacos on Monday, make extra Turkey to use in Turkey Chili in a day or so. I prefer cooking the extra Turkey and putting it in the slow cooker to make chili that I can either take in to work for lunch or have for dinner in a day or two. I’ll have the great Turkey Chili recipe posted soon so check back to get that too. Two tips in one-How can you beat that?

A Sick Day off?

autoimmune disease

mom headacheSo I’m just beginning to get my blog off the ground when I get sick.

Have you ever seen the commercial on tv where the adult leans into a room sniffling and says, ” I think I am going to have to call in sick tomorrow.”, then the picture pans to the whole room and you are looking at a parent speaking to a child standing in a crib. I laugh every time I see this commercial because there is no time off for a single parent even when you are extremely sick. Somehow as parents we gather up some strength from deep down inside and make it through the day, knowing that a good nights rest will make it better tomorrow morning.

I try not to be crazy about illness, but because I suffer from immune defiency disorder, I tend to stay away from the sniffling coworkers during the day and I tell my daughter to try to stay away from sick friends. I  do my best to convince her that no one in a sick situation needs a hug, but that rarely goes over well with her kind heart.

The only support system I have are a few friends that I would trust with my daughters life. If you have a friend that can help, this is the time to let them pick your child up from school if they volunteer to do so.

This is the night that all the important mommy duties will be performed, but all other duties will wait until another day. Do I get a demerit somewhere for this? It may be microwaved chicken nuggets and mac and cheese and we might go to bed a little earlier than normal, but no harm is done and my mommy duties such as dishes might wait until tomorrow.



Every child needs to learn the value of money. An allowance is the best way for them to learn as they earn. You know what your child is capable of but I am from the old school age where we did all of our chores first thing Saturday morning before we were allowed to watch cartoons that waited for no one.

Children should be given chores based appropriately on thier age. I have researched many areas and have come up with the following list that will give you an idea of what your child should be capable of.

2-3 Years of Age

  • Make the Bed
  • Pick Up Toys
  • Put clothes in the hamper

4-5 Years of Age

  • Help Set the Table
  • Put away thier Laundry
  • Keep thier room organized
  • Water Plants
  • Feed Pets

6-8 Years of Age

  • Empty Dishwasher
  • Wipe down Counter Tops
  • Help Sort Laundry

9-11 Years of Age

  • Vacuum
  • Help with Food Prep ( my daughter helps cut the veges and puts them into prep bowls for the week)
  • Walk Dog

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