Pioneer Woman


pioneer-womanLast year as I was reviewing my fourth grader’s Social Studies test, I couldn’t help but laugh at an answer she had written. Of course in Fourth Grade it is all about the BEST answer, not a correct answer to a problem as it is enforced in Kindergarten through Third Grade, so fourth grade was a big change for us both. The test question was “What is the BEST reason that pioneer life was often considered very lonely?” The multiple choice answers were:

  • No one came to visit for their vacation
  • People were dying too easily
  • They hated all of their neighbors
  • They spent too much time working

My daughter chose “B- People were dying too easily.” I laughed to myself,  not really the right reaction when reading this, because yes, if people around you were dying all the time, you would feel pretty lonely, but of course the BEST answer was that they were working all the time.

Don’t get me wrong, I am sure they read something about pioneers dying so that made her think that she had chosen the best answer and as a single parent, she has expressed concerns to me on occasion about what would happen to her if something should ever happen to me.  My daughter has a lot of family on her father’s side that she is in constant contact with and I remind her of that whenever she brings up this issue so it should never be a thought or fear of hers, but children of divorced parents always think of this subject. While I am prepared to respond with what I feel is the correct response now, I can tell you the first time she asked me about this was when I was first diagnosed with cancer and very sick several years ago, I was caught off guard.

But with the Social Studies test, I began to think, how many of us still act like Pioneers? Believe me there was a time years ago when I worked several jobs at once, seven days a week – just to get by and I could still barely make rent, let alone eat a decent meal, but these days when I work overtime it because I enjoy it and I am finally healthy enough once again that I feel better the more hours I put in. I volunteered for extra duties at work just to keep myself so busy that I don’t have a second to look at the clock.

I come home and take care of my duties as a mom, but then I am a student, and I blog as a fun outlet to me-my hobby. Plus, I hope it helps some of you new as being a single parents. When I was a newly single mom years ago, there was no internet or blogging, or even cell phones, and I just lived day by day by the seat of my pants.

I have chosen not to date for many reasons but I dont feel lonely or like I am missing something except for those few holidays that society is hell bent on making you feel like you need someone to be complete.

The strange thing is that I don’t feel lonely. I feel fulfilled. I have several strong relationships with friends that I have known for years and that would help me at any time. That is what I feel I need-just a true blue friend that would help me if I needed the help. I know many women that feel lonely and that is why I am telling you that you don’t need to work constantly or have a relationship with the opposite sex to feel fulfilled. You just have to have faith and true friends. I can tell you that with a relationship with my higher power combined with my relationship with my children, plus doing what I feel is best for my health, that I enjoy my life and don’t feel like a Pioneer any more.

I enjoy coming home to my place that I rent, coming home to my remote. Yes, if the right person comes along I would like to get to know a man again but not right now. I know for me that I have just gotten my daughter in the right place, I have just gotten my heath and work in the right place. Next comes a relationship if it comes along, but my priorities have changed making my spiritually first, family next, then the job. If God feels like I am ready for something else on my plate he will send someone my way.

So as far as my pioneer test I think I have passed.

  • No one came to visit for their vacation- people come to see me on thier vacation and I enjoy spending time with my family when we can all get together with our crazy schedules.
  • People were dying too easily-So far everyone is pretty healthy with the advancement of modern medicine.
  • They hated all of their neighbors- I am thankful and grateful that I get along well with all of my neighbors. In fact they check on me if they see my car hasn’t moved in a day or so.
  • They spent too much time working-now I know that while work is good, family comes first and I have been known to pass up overtime to spend time with my children all three of them if I have the opportunity.

How are you doing a a pioneer?

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I am a single parent of three wonderful children. Two boys who are grown and live out on their own and a teenage daughter at home. I have gone through a lot of drama with divorce and sickness- just to start, but have found my way out of the shadows and I am ready to motivate and empower women with what I have learned. Being unqualified is exactly what makes me qualified. I work full time in the corporate world, I'm a parent, and I resell products on several different online platforms. Last, but the most important, I am a Christ follower at Church By The Glades.